The King James Virgin

The Four Horsemen of Our Current Apocalypse

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick the story of Naaman. Nick learns that Alan and Adam grew up in a church obsessed with prophesy (and prepping).

Naaman Has "Leprosy"

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick the story of Naaman. Nick learns that Alan and Adam have vastly different understandings of the sonic qualities of punctuation.

Elisha Kills Some Youths

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick the story of Elisha and the Bears. Nick learns that just two verses can spark the imagination of a young Adam.

Bible Battle Bracket - Round II

In this episode, once again, Alan and Adam battle it out in a tournament setup by Nick. Nick learns that DC Talk’s and the Talking Heads’s careers never overlapped…coincidence?!?

Jesus Would Have Been a Socialist

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick about Jesus’s politics. Nick learns that Jesus probably would Feel the Bern!

Unclean Animals - Peter’s Weird Dream and Leviticus

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick about Peter’s weird dream that changed everything. Nick learns that he’s been eating ALL of the wrong types animals.

David Gets All Oiled Up, Part 2 of 2

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick more stories about the life of David. Nick learns that it’s possible David and Oprah had something in common. Shhhh, it’s a secret.

David Gets All Oiled Up, Part 1 of 2

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick more stories about the life of David. Nick learns that Saul was a really shitty dinner host.

David Does a Bad Thing

In this episode, Alan and Adam tell Nick about the story of David, Bathsheba, and Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah”. Nick learns that Alan really doesn’t like Susan Boyle.

Evie's Catholic Corner: Self-Flagellation, Relics, and Stigmata

In this episode, Nick, Alan, and Adam listen to Evie talk about Catholicism. Nick learns that the (current) pope doesn’t like red shoes.